DMCC

We need a new couch.  There are many reasons, but M and I have found yet another very important motivation. 

Our current couch has only two cushions.  They're big cushions, so the problem isn't so much that the couch is not big enough (although once Kate starts taking up significant couch real estate that will become an issue as well).  The problem is that we really need three cushions in order to keep Claire and Scott from fighting when they're both on the couch. 

"Mom!  Claire's not giving me anywhere to sit!"
"MOM!  Scott's pushing me!"
"MO-OM!  Claire's kicking at my feet!"

One might think that two is enough because it provides a clear halfway point.  All I SHOULD have to do is call a cease fire and then designate Claire's side and Scott's side, right?  But in practice the only way to really achieve lasting peace is a demilitarized zone.  Or should I say a "demilitarized couch cushion"?

In Parallel

Scott has been adding to his list of what he wants to be when he grows up.  The other day he added a third career. 

"First I want to be an ambulance driver, then I want to be an astronaut, then I want to be a paleontologist."

Did we point out the unlikelihood of managing all three of these careers?  No.
Did we simply encourage him that he can do it if he works hard?  Of course not.
Instead, geeky parents that we are, we tried to help him streamline his goals.  M was quick to suggest that perhaps he could be the first aid specialist on a mission to excavate fossils on another planet.

Does anyone know of a college that lets you study to become an EMT certified xenobiologist???

I'm Really, Really, Really, Really, REALLY Sick of That Word

I have a new rule of thumb for Scott:

It's true, using the word "really" is an effective way to add emphasis.  HOWEVER, if you say so many "reallys" that you have to stop for a breath (let alone four breaths), you are overdoing it.

Here is a typical scenario.

Scott:  I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really...

*G tunes out for awhile and thinks about where she will get her next chocolate fix*
G, thinking to herself:  Oh maybe he's done now...
 
Scott: ...really, really...

G, thinking to herself:  I guess not.  Maybe I'll go make a sandwich.

*time passes -- a lot of time*

G, thinking to herself:  I should check in again...

Scott:  ...really, really, really, really...

G, thinking to herself:  Geez kid, spit it out already.

Scott:  ...really, really, really want a treat.

G:  Scott, you didn't eat your dinner.

Scott:  But I HATE dinner.

G:  Well, you can't have a treat unless you eat dinner.

Scott:  But I really, really, really, really..........

----------

And now "really" officially doesn't look like a real word to me anymore after writing it that many times.

Projects

I don't ACTUALLY have any spare time, but I need something to look forward to. Otherwise this time of year the days just blur together... or maybe it's just my itching gunky allergy stricken eyes that make everything foggy. Either way, by carefully neglecting other tasks, here's what I have been doing.


Making hair bows:

(And I have the hot glue gun burns to prove it.)

By golly, Kate will wear ribbons in her hair or so help me! (Claire would rather die than let ribbon come anywhere NEAR her hair. Now Kate is paying for it.)


Valentine's Garland:

I started this project when I saw several people on the web doing it because I thought, "Hey! That's pretty simple. Maybe Claire and I could work on that together." Yah, so I forgot that, genius as she is, motor skills are not really Claire's forte. Watching her decimate huge chunks of felt buy cutting right smack dab in the middle of the fabric was hard. And the result was a whole bunch of itty-bitty worthless irregular polygons. If you squinted really hard, some of them ALMOST looked like hearts. The few that were big enough to use basically had to be re-cut completely. I'm an impatient jerk and a failure as a mother, but oh well. No more trying to craft with Claire for at least another year or two. It's not worth my brain exploding.


New Lights in the Kitchen:

These lights are troublemakers. You know how you always start a project and think, "Oh, this will be easy. I'll just do this real quick"? And then it never is easy and it always takes WAY longer than you planned for? Well, I know that's at least how it usually works at our house. Everything always takes way longer and you start to think that you will mend your unrealistic expectating ways and get real. You will stop dreaming quite so big. You will lower your expectations.

And then something like these lights comes along.

You start shopping for a totally different light for a totally different spot in your kitchen. And while you're at it, you and your spouse casually toy with the idea of looking for something to replace this light too. Then at one point you're at IKEA looking for something else entirely, and you decide to stop into the lighting department, just to peek. And, miracle of all miracles, you and your spouse agree with almost no prior discussion on a lighting fixture. AND it's only $25. So you buy it. Then in about an hour and a half, you install the light. No problems. Smooth as can be. And now you have all this glorious light over your kitchen sink. And you're thinking, "We should replace ALL our lights!" And so it begins...

This stupid light just got my hopes back up that maybe every home improvement we want to do will be this easy. And now let the biting off more than we can chew commence...

--------BEWARE! G'S MIND IS ABOUT TO OFFICIALLY ACT LIKE A 10 YEAR OLD--------

And speaking of replacing ugly lights, what is it with lighting fixtures shaped like unfortunate pieces of anatomy??? The light pictured above replaced one that reminded me of a piece of anatomy that well, let's just say I don't have. I'm glad that one is gone because it's really nice to look at the light above the sink without sniggering.

We are in the market to replace a couple fixtures that remind me of something that might make Kate hungry.

"Hey boob light. You're next!"

Just a Little Tip

When you're cooking dinner and you put one of your stainless steel pans into the oven, you should be careful.  I think we all know that we should use a hot pad to take the pan out of the oven.  But did you know that when you go to serve the food out of the pan, you should NOT steady said pan by grabbing the bare metal handle with your bare hand?  Your ENTIRE bare hand?  Yes, well.  You can trust me on this one.