Sunday, July 15, 2007

Dogs vs. Small Children

We spent most of yesterday cleaning our new house to get ready to move in. The door from the kitchen to the garage has a little dog door in it from the previous occupants. The kids quickly discovered this. Claire thought it was a very convenient way to keep talking to M while he worked in the garage! Scott saw it less as a means of communication, and more as an escape route. He never actually made it out, but he tried! Seeing my children's faces peeking out of a dog door reminded me of my firm stance that we won't have a dog until we're done having small children. Why have a dog when you already have a toddler!

Observe the parallels:

-They slobber all over the place.
-They chew on everything, especially important or expensive things.
-They beg for your food when you eat.
-You're not supposed to feed them whatever you're eating.
-They don't come house-broken.
-They'll play with their own poop.
-They wake you up in the middle of the night.
-They howl.
-They can't communicate, unless you count puppy dog eyes.
-They freak out during thunder storms.
-You have to give them obedience training.
-You have to teach them not to bite.
-You have to get them shots.
-They come in from outside with grass in their fur and get mud all over your floor.
-You have to bathe and groom them.
-They like to play fetch.
-Their toys are all over your floor.
-They sleep in what basically amounts to a cage.
-You can't leave them alone for too long.
-They get really excited when you come home.
-You have to spell out the few words they understand to keep them from getting too excited.
-They're always underfoot and making you trip.
-They follow you around the house.
-They want to play ALL THE TIME!

But when it's all said and done, at least children grow up and eventually learn to say, "I love you."

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